Poop Jokes

Did you know that diarrhea is hereditary?

It runs in your genes.

I ate four cans of alphabet soup yesterday.

Then I had probably the biggest vowel movement ever.

Have you seen that new movie Constipated?

It's not come out yet.

And have you seen the sequel, Diarrhea?

It leaked so they had to release it early.

People who tell you that they're constipated are full of crap.

Laughter is the best medicine.

Unless you have diarrhea...

Did you hear about the constipated composer?

He had problems with his last movement.

Do clown farts smell funny?

A little boy is walking down the country road one day when he comes across a man who has a truck load of cow manure.

The boy asks him what he's going to do with all that cow poop.

The man says, "I'm taking it home to put on my strawberries."

The little boy looks up at the man and says, "I don't know where you come from, but where I come from we put cream and sugar on our strawberries."

Did you hear about the constipated accountant?

He couldn't budget.

Did you know that when you say the word "poop", your mouth does the same motion as your bum hole?

The same is true for the phrase, "explosive diarrhoea".

You never really appreciate what you've got until it's gone.

Toilet paper is a good example.

People say love is the best feeling ever.

But I think finding a toilet when you're having diarrhea is better.